Reduce stress and stop asking for permission to do so. 

When I talk about finding joy sometimes people think it means being happy all the time. Or they think it’s ignoring what’s happening in their lives that isn’t feeling good. Or maybe you think, “I’m going to choose happy.”

While that can work sometimes, it doesn't always work. It can be like forcing a square peg into a round hole.

What I’m talking about when I talk about cultivating real joy. Authentic joy.

It’s really simple. It’s about finding ways to feel good. It all comes back to feeling good.

When you feel good, you are aligned to your Higher Self and to your source. The name you use for source doesn’t matter. Call it God, The Universe, Spirit, Source, the name doesn’t matter. The alignment does.

Feeling good means you are in alignment. When you feel bad you are out of alignment. The more you feel good, the more in alignment you are.

You might be thinking, “That’s easier said than done.” But it’s pretty darn easy. 

I’m going to talk to you about the power of hydration. Yep. Drinking water. You might be thinking that is an unexpected place to start talking about joy, but stay with me. 

When you are hydrated… your brain is plump like a grape. When you are dehydrated your brain is shriveled like a raisin. 

And there’s more. You are 99.9% energy and only .001% matter. Check out the work of Dr. Joe Dispenze. He is proving this in labs in California RIGHT NOW.  

You know what else? Water is a conductor of energy. We all know not to blow dry your hair while standing in water. 

Not only will you have more energy when you drink more water because your body can function better, but you conducting more energy. We also know that your body is more than 60% water. 

The first thing people say when I suggest my clients drink more water is this… “how can I possibly drink more water when I don’t have time to use the restroom?”

I see you. I know how hard that can be. Especially if you are in a caring profession like teaching, nursing, serving in the food industry, etc. I promise there are strategies than can help even if you work in a caring profession. 

But before we talk about strategy I need to tell you something. 

No one is ever going to give you permission to use the bathroom. It’s not going to happen. Can you imagine your boss saying, “do you need to go potty?”. Yeah, not happening. 

When you are little you were taught you needed to ask to use the restroom at school. That’s fair - a teacher responsible for 24 or 30 6-year-olds needs to know where the kids are, who is out of the room, etc.  But some of us carry that same permission-asking into adulthood.

Stop waiting for permission. No one is going to come rescue you. 

It’s time for you to grasp the autonomy that comes from taking control of when you use the bathroom.

When you do this, you put the universe on notice by saying “I matter.” And you put your own brain on notice telling yourself, “I matter.”

You will show up differently in EVERY of your life when you treat yourself like you matter. And you DO matter. 

How does water help you?

Water helps you digest. Did you know that heart burn is a symptom of dehydration? Nausea can be a sign of dehydration? 

Headaches? Could be a sign of dehydration.

Falling asleep unexpectedly without trying? Tired? It could be dehydration.

Grumpy? Irritable? Bad mood? It could be dehydration.

Your body is 60% water so it makes sense that your body needs water to function. 

Why is this linked ot feeling joy and reducing stress? When you take care of your body in this way it increases your sense of empowerment. It signals to you and everyone around you… that you matter. And you do. Everything else begins to cascade from this simple move to take care of your hydration and your need to bathroom.

Not only will you feel better, and digest things better, but your mood will also be more consistent and you’ll probably have an elevated mood. 

Let’s talk strategy.  Drink 16 - 24 ounces upon waking. Then you start the day with hydration. You’ll be able to use the bathroom before you leave for work. You can add 16 ounces at breakfast. Drink a large quantity of water (16 - 24 ounces about 20-40 minutes before a break. Then you can use the bathroom when you get your break. I’ll add drink water over my break, and then drink 16-24 ounces before my work day. 

Try to stop drinking water 1 - 2 hours before bed so you don’t have to wake up to use the bathroom. 

Let’s talk about how much water you should be drinking. Deborah C. Smith - creator of Plant Based Kitchen teaches that women need 2.5 liters a day and men need 3 liters a day.  Is that more than you usually drink?

It was more than I was drinking!! 

One strategy that works really well is using a reusable water bottle. It helps you track how much you are drinking. When you use a glass of water it’s easy to fill it up while there’s still water inside, and then you inflate how much you *think* you drink. But with the reusable bottle, you can really pay attention and track it. 

In addition to drinking more water, I want you to try something this week.

Pay attention to how you feel when someone you are with excuses themself to go to the bathroom. Watch yourself and notice how you feel. Does it bug you?

If it bugs you, it’s probably because you’re irritated that they had the courage to speak up and take care of themselves. If that happens, it’s a red flag that you are ignoring your own need to use the bathroom. 

When you start to care for yourself in such a basic way, it’s amazing what else will come into focus for you.

I know that jumping right into 2.5 liters a day might be too much. If that’s you… Can you add a glass of water a day each day to get to 2.5 or 3 liters? Start slow, and add a little more each day. 

When you stop giving away your power in something so basic as hydration and using the bathroom, you will feel different about yourself. You will start to realize that you have a lot more choice and a lot more authority over your own life.

If you are in a field like nursing, teaching, serving.. I know it might be tricky for you. Maybe you can hydrate before your shift and after your shift?? You can still make this work.

And unless somebody is literally dying… you can excuse yourself to go to the restroom when you need to. You think someone is going to mad at you for stopping to use the bathroom, but that’s hardly EVER true. And if it is… let’s talk.

I want to hear from you!! I want to know how this works for you?

AND.. I want to share a free gift with you. Meditation is the key to joy. You reduce stress, you soothe yourself, you reduce cortisol. 

I have a free meditation for you. It’s at brendawinkle.com/feelbetter It is going to make a big difference. 

I got an email from one listener this week and she said, “I’ve never been able to meditate until your meditation.”

Oh and one more thing… what’s in your morning mug?? Let me know either by emailing or reaching out on social media.