Have you ever had a circumstance or situation that you didn’t like, but it kept sticking around? I bet most of us have!! The cause is often resistance.
This week’s affirmation is so simple and yet has the potential to completely change your experiences and your life. These words were originally Carl Jung’s. Jung was a Swiss psychiatrist and psychotherapist who is credited as one of the founders of modern psychology. Our affirmation this week is “What you resist persists”.
Why resistance causes things to stick around
When we put up resistance to anything (change, our body’s health or shape, people, circumstances, emotions, etc) our focus is on what we are resisting (or what we don’t want). If you have been in a particular circumstance or situation you would like to change for a long time, it is time to look at the possibility of resistance causing that (situation, circumstance, emotion, health condition) to remain in your life.
Sometimes this focus is subconscious and we don’t realize we are offering resistance. For example, have you ever felt really sad about something but refused to sink into that emotion? You try to stuff it down and pretend that everything is ok. You are not allowing yourself to consciously feel the emotion (resistance) but it comes out in other ways. Sometimes when we stuff down emotions we become short tempered with those around us or we find ourselves indulging in unhealthy behaviors like drinking or eating too much. Because we haven’t dealt with the emotion, it continues to come out in ways we may not be completely aware of.
Other times we are completely aware of the resistance we are offering. If you are in anger, sadness, or anxiety you are experiencing resistance.
We know through the Law of Attraction that what we focus upon magnifies. This is especially true if the focus is caused by our resistance to something – even if it is subconsious.
Why do we resist?
Most of the time, the root cause of resistance is fear. We fear being different or not fitting in, we fear not being heard, we fear not being loved, we fear change. We fear success or we fear failure. But often times, if we sit into the fear, we can begin to change our feelings and experiences.
When we can learn to sit with our resistance and in that discomfort, it begins to ease. Allow yourself to sink into the discomfort and try to learn what is at the root of your resistance. Try meditation or journaling to help you figure out what you are trying to resist. Many times if you use journaling or meditation, you will realize that what you’ve been resisting isn’t as bad as you thought. You may learn you have far more control than you had imagined when you were stuck in fear.
If you are struggling to get to the bottom of your fear, you might try EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) or Tapping. There are some incredible resources on tapping. My recommendation would be Nick Ortner’s book and movie by the same title, “The Tapping Solution”. ThetaHealing® Meditation Technique can also really help. You can view more about it here or by visiting www.thetahealing.com.
Creating lasting and healthy change in how you feel
Once you have determined what is at the root of your resistance, consciously try to embrace whatever you have been trying to resist.
Dreading a change? Ask yourself why. Do you fear loosing freedom? Do you fear making new friends? Is it just the unknown? Are you trying to control outcomes? Spend some time developing strategies that will address what it is you are fearing.
Do you find yourself in self-sabotage with your weight? Ask yourself what you have to lose if you lose weight. Are you using the weight to protect yourself from something? Or are you using food to avoid feeling things? Try a daily food journal to see if you can find a pattern.
Stuck in a cycle of procrastination? What are you afraid of? Success? Failure? Ask yourself what you are gaining by procrastinating, and determine if what you are gaining is actually positive. If you are gaining something positive by procrastinating, maybe you the thing you are avoiding is actually something you should let go. If you aren’t seeing any positive benefits to your procrastination, ask yourself what you are really afraid of. Spend time sinking into that discomfort to determine if your fear is real or imagined. Either way, look for strategies to help you.
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