Last week was my birthday. It was a wonderful day! My students and colleagues wished me a happy day all day long. My family all called me before my day had even begun. Even my 19-year-old daughter set an alarm to be sure she called me before I left for school. Friends brought me cake and dinner, a friend sent flowers, people texted and emailed, and many people sent birthday greetings through Facebook. My family got me the perfect thoughtful gifts and my parents fixed birthday dinner. It was lovely! And it got me thinking… there are so many ways we communicate with people to tell them we love them beyond saying the words, “I love you.”
Taking time to have a conversation on a busy day is love. People show love when they remember something that has been going on in your life and ask about it. When friends show up on your doorstep with dinner, that’s love. The phone calls out of the blue, texts telling you they are thinking of you, emails from family are all acts of love. The smile from a friend (when you can only see their eyes crinkle because of the mask), the kind words of encouragement, and dinner invitations are all forms of love.
We often only talk about romantic love or love in a family. There is a lot more love than that!!
By reframing the daily connections or occasional reach outs as acts of love, what changes for you? My bet is: You feel loved. It can also help to remember that you can’t offer love without getting some on you. By showing up for people you are communicating that you care about them, that you love them. The more love you give, the more love you feel so a great way to start feeling love is to show love.
The kind words (verbal affirmations), pats on the shoulder (physical touch), flowers (gifts), cooked dinner (acts of service), and hanging out with me on a Friday night or having a long phone call (quality time) are all ways to show love. You are loved more than you know. Probably – we all are loved more than we know because we often only see the love that speaks to our primary love language. Remembering there is more to that… feels pretty awesome. Here is to all of us feeling more love!
All my love,